One of the funnier (in retrospect) stories from the OBF was the accidental introduction of Barley and Maddie right by Barley’s food dish. As I recently mentioned, Barley is turning in to a bit of a situational asshole. Well, it turns out his buttons are threats to food, threats to toys, and getting hurt. This is the story from my perspective, and there are probably at least 4 decent versions going around.
Andrew and I go into the basement to get some fans to help cool down the house. As we re-entered the house, Barley slipped by us into the sun room where Holly, Michelle and Maddie were doing part of the home tour or something. Barley immediately noticed that Maddie was *in the same room* as his food and transformed into asshole Barley (Barshole). This was a bit spookier than previous tussles because Maddie screamed bloody murder (barked it, anyway) and Barley grabbed at her collar. I pulled them apart but they were still close to each other and Barley simply went back at Maddie, once again grabbing her collar and a fair amount of hair. I grabbed his collar and tried to pull him off Maddie, thus lifting both dogs a little. Eventually I used my leg to wedge them apart and threw Barshole to the rug and pinned him down while Maddie escaped. The whole scene was rather scary, and I ended up with terra cotta tile burns (like rug burns) on my knees. Once we’d all calmed down, someone noticed that there was a single, solitary turd on the tile. It appears that Maddie (though it could have been anyone, I suppose) had the crap scared out of them, literally, by the incident. No one wanted to take the blame, so for the purpose of this story (and history), Maddie had the crap scared out of her.
I venture that Barley’s side of the story went like this:
Do do do do do – I’m so excited there are people here – people to pet me. Let’s go back inside – look more people! Oh crap – there’s a dog trying to eat my food! I’ll kill her. I’ll kill her. I’m totally kicking her ass! What the hell – The hairy human seems upset with me. Oh – they’ve left defenses down and the dog is trying to eat my food again! I’ll kill her! I’m being lifted! I’m being slammed to the ground and yelled at! What did I do? That’s my food! What’s that smell?….
Maddie’s was probably something like this:
(nervous pant noise) We’re in a strange place. Where’s Holly going? I should follow her. Holy cow – there’s a dog attacking me. I’d better scream! Help! Help! Help! oh good – they’re saving me. Oh no – he’s attacking again! What did I do? Save me! Save me! (poop!) Oh – I’m so embarrassed! I’d better go outside.
I’m not really sure what other sides of the story sound like – but I know Andrew was somewhat pleased that Maddie finally got her comeuppance, though I don’t think she deserved being attacked by Barshole. They got along the rest of the weekend, but what a nightmare.